I'm back from the BLOGGING Dead

This is such a sad story with a very happy ending. Okay, so one day I sat at the computer screen and began to do the usual things like check my email, check Shane's email, and help Eli earn money on his Webkinz game and something started to happen. My throat started to feel pressure and I started to breath deeply while feeling my heart racing. I started thinking about my life and my situation and I thought, 'wow! I am so unhappy.' I am a very optimistic person and have always been happy when I am with my husband and children so I began to analyze my situation. I have been having a terrible time with my health lately. I have had terrible acne, digestive problems, and my throat has been sore. I am lucky I own good makeup because I would not leave the house without it. Not to mention that I haven't been able to sing since we came to Washington from Hawaii. I realized how lost I have been without my voice. I always used to sing around the house and I was feeling so empty. I have to lay my children down at night without singing them a song and finally now Eli just says, "You'll tuck us in and give us kisses, but no songs anymore right?" I have been trying so hard to get my health insurance figured out so I can get into the right doctors and get taken care of. I thought about how greatful I was to have my family around to help us out. Shane hasn't gotten a job since we moved and we've been living with family. I took a break and went to the restroom and after washing my hands I saw a face in the mirror that I didn't recognize. I am not vain but I was so proud of myself for getting healthy, losing weight while doing P90X last spring. I saw some weight gain due to inactivity, eating habits, and a presciption I'm on. I saw acne instead of Mary. I moped back to the computer screen and started looking up solutions to my health problems that I couldn't afford. I looked up different throat conditions and holistic aproaches to diagnose and cure throat conditions, different foods that promote health that were very expensive, and different vitamins that improve acne that were also expensive. I finally checked my email and saw a name that triggered the tears. Stimmel. Trying to fight through the tears I shot a quick email to Leah about how my cell phone was broken and can almost never recieve or return calls on it. I ended the email that said I miss you and I was just overwhelmed. I walked into my room and just thought about how I missed all the times in Hawaii with friends. I couldn't quite figure out why I was sad now and not as much a couple months ago. I decided I needed to do something about this whole problem. I knew I couldn't get Shane a job, or just buy what I needed/wanted, but I could be more proactive about other things. I feel uncomfortable working out in front of people, so living with people doesn't help that situation. I can't buy any food I want because we are being assisted from other people. I could however show up at my doctor's everyday to let them know how important and high priority I need to be. All my hard work at bugging the doctors paid off and I am seeing an allergist and an ENT next week. YAY! I had a nice weekend spending time in Vancouver with the Stimmel's for Taylor's birthday. It really made my weekend. Then to top off the wonderful weekend Shane got a phone call last night and YES HE HAS A JOB!!!!!!! He starts training on the 17th and I'll go into that later, but we are extremely excited. I was so excited about all the progress that was made for our future in just a couple days. Yesterday didn't feel as good as I thought it should. I spent time with Shane and my family, but there was still a little empty feeling. I know part of it is still not having my voice back, but I couldn't figure out what else to do. I woke up this morning at 4am, could't fall back asleep, and went to the computer again. I found myself looking up Shane's new company and places to live and I read something about Christmas that said Noel on it. My thoughts immediately went to Noelle and I started to cry. I went straight to a site that has not been looked up in a long time. My Blog. I realize at that moment what was missing. I have been so distracted with my own life and problems that I forgot to keep checking in on those that I have come to care about in the last three years. I blame it on those darn Twilight books that distracted me so much. Thanks Noelle for that. After I finished the final book I forgot to go back to blogging. I couldn't fall asleep and knew I needed to post before I walked away from the computer screen again. I miss you Shanae, Angie, Hillary, Erin, Keiko, and Noelle. I can't wait to get caught up on your lives. I'm sorry I got so self-absorbed but you'll be hearing from me more often. I love you all!

Here are a few updated pictures of the boys! Jacob just had his First Birthday on Oct. 27th and he's walking. Seth and Eli and doing well but miss their friends so much!

Hanging with Shelbi and Dancing

Shelbi is Shane's twelve year old sister. It has been so much fun spending time with her, Jessi, and Grandma Debbi. Shells loves spending time with the boys playing games and doing crafts. Shells spent time making bouncy balls with the boys just the other day. She even babysat for us so we could get some time together a couple of weeks ago. She is so sweet and she is such a good dancer. She competed in Seaside, OR a week ago and placed in first. She has even introduced the boys to dancing. Elijah and Seth go to a beginning Gymnastics class every Tuesday night followed by Elijah going to a preschool dance class that involves beginning Jazz and Ballet. Their instructor is Joe and he is amazing with the kids. He calls his class Joe-nastics. The boys are learning so much.

Visit at the Park

Rosie had her first attempt to visit with her biological father, Erik, at the park. She was so excited to see him, but felt a little uneasy after she saw him. I completely understand because she is away from what she's used to and in a different living situation right now. I have seen this so many times where the children feel so confused, unsafe, and just want something that they're used to. She is doing so well and she knows the situation is only temporary. I am so proud of her. She had so much fun with Jenn and Seth playing that she didn't want to leave.

Rosie and Seth had Jenn pushing them on the swings for a long time. Jenn and I had a fantastic time playing with the kids and we saw Margo for the first time in a long time. I didn't do very good about getting pictures of Margo or Erik which was the whole point ..... but that's okay.

It really is so sweet to see Rosie and Seth become such great friends. I love Rosie's pose because she was play fighting. I love it when you see little boys playing house or princess with the girls or girls playing super hero or fighting games with the boys.

Jason was a gentleman cowboy at the park that day. It was so funny to see him do cowboy mannerisms and complete with hat, boots, and lasso. It was so adorable.

Rosie Posie Coming to Olympia

Rosie came to live with Grandnan and Grandaddy on the first of August. Rosie is my sister Tammy's daughter. It has been so nice to spend time with Rosie again. She misses her brother Maddox, her daddy Corey, and especially her mommy.

Tammy loves to play with Seth. She always calls him 'my friend' when they are playing and 'your son' when they're fighting. They ask to see each other every day and love to play dress up, race, take baths, and of course EAT together. Mary is always there to follow them around and try to mimic everything they do and we always try to get them to include her. It tough being the little big girl.

Rosie and Seth love to swim around in the bath and take turns going all the way under the water. Rosie always says, "I don't want any of these toys. I don't want them. get these toys out of the bath. She is really so adorable and sweet. She is well behaved and loves learning.

July Dahmen Family Visit

This is my wonderful sister Dorthy. Dorthy is my big sister that thought of me as a pain in her side growing up. Jenn and I was terrible for her when she had to babysit, we used to spy on her with her boyfriends, we would make jokes about her and her various friends and boyfriends, and we would never let anything 'go'. It has been so nice to get to know her more as a friend in the past ten years. I absolutely love my brother in law, Greg. I remember when Dorthy came to visit Olympia and she was so excited about this guy that was so much fun. She talked him up and I trusted her judgement, but I thought there would be no way he was as good as she was saying. I remember asking to see a picture and saying, "Wow! He is so good looking!" I was not even surprised because my sister is gorgeous, but I had to say it anyways. Dorthy, I love you and I am so excited to see you so happy.

It was so much fun spending time with Dorthy, Greg, and the new baby boy Nick. He is just precious! Nick slept a lot, whimpered a little, and when he talked it sounded like a kitten meowing. I loved the relaxing weekend we had.

Greg is so much fun. It was nice to see a man's man be so playful with his nephews and nieces and be so careful with his son. Greg thanks for being a wonderful husband to my sister. She really deserves a good man like you to have great times with. Just remember that all of the moodiness after a baby isn't her fault. We, as mothers, have to train to not go crazy with the new responsibilities and lack of sleep. I am just speaking from personal experience even though Dorthy didn't seem that bad when we spent time together.

My family really enjoyed your family and I can't wait to see you guys again whether we come to your place or you come to Olympia.

Jason's Baptism

Jason is my little brother who has been such a wonderful blessing in my life. Jaybird celebrated his baptism just a few weeks ago. He recently celebrated his ninth birthday on June 11, 2008. He had been holding off getting baptised because he just didn't feel ready. We are all so proud of your choices Jason. Joining the church is an amazing decision and I am grateful to be there on your baptism day. I didn't have my camera at the baptism, so here are some pictures from the after party at Charlies Safari. Here is Jason with Jay Jay in one of the bounce houses.

Elijah is always happy to be spending time with Jason. They had so much fun playing laser tag over and over again.

Seth had a blast going down the slides and playing in the bounce houses. Seth also loved playing games to win tickets. He won the most tickets out of the three boys.

Baby Mary just couldn't get enough bounce house fun. She is so daring and strong that she kept getting away and climbing up the bigger bounce house slide by herself. It was so much fun to spend this special day together.

Lakehouse Fun!

Not too long after our return home from the family reunion we had a relaxing day out at Jammi and Mike's lake house with Debbi, Jessi, and Shelbi. It was so much fun and we really did relax. This is Debbi having a drink before going out on the boat.

Jessi was having fun on the jet ski herself and helping the boys get on and off with Shane. She is so adorable and is very helpful with her nephews.

Shelbi went out on the lake with Elijah and Seth a lot. They had so much fun on the paddle boat. Elijah was brave enough to swim without help (with a life jacket) and supervision was close by on the dock.

Shane had fun taking the boys out on the jet ski taking turns. They had missed being in the water so much that they didn't even mind that it was freezing cold! Jacob and I watched from up above. He was being a little too clingy to leave his mommy.

Smith Family Reunion

Just two days after coming home from Disney world we headed off to Lake Tahoe for our family reunion. My mom is one of ten children. She has seven brothers and two sisters. Eight of the ten are married with children. I currently have over 50 first cousins just on this side of the family. Many of my cousins have children including one set of triplets. Our reunion was so much fun, but as you can see all of us didn't make it. It was a blast to see my aunties and uncles and hang out with my cousins. I loved introducing them to my new family (Shane and the boys). This was a first time introduction for many of them. We spent two nights at Lake Tahoe. I enjoyed it but it was not nearly long enough.

I love this picture because of how harmless it looks. I know. Well don't let that beautiful lake fool you. On our way to the campsite only a couple miles out of town we saw a bear cross the freeway. No joke. I didn't get a picture because I was too busy being scared and rolling up my window. Shane made fun of me, but that bear was huge. I wouldn't have wanted us to stop and the bear come and maul me through the window. Shane still thinks I am ridiculous. The second bear I saw was the first night at the campground. I woke up to screaming across the way. I didn't just hear a scream, but I heard a lot of screaming. I jumped up and unzipped our tent window and in the moonlight I saw our neighbors across the way jumping in their SUV. The engine started and the headlights turned on just in time to see a black blur scurry up the side of the hill. I could not believe it and wanted to leave first thing in the morning. I was having a panic attack so I woke up Shane. After he calmed me down I was able to rest, but that was the longest night ever. I had to pee so bad and refused to leave the tent. Shane was teasing me that there wasn't going to be a bear in the bathroom. I still waited until sunrise to leave and I made Shane go with me. That morning we found out that the ignorant girls across the way left a bunch of garbage around their campsite instead of in the provided bear locker. We enjoyed breakfast and my mom said she awoke later that night to digging near her tent. She stayed calm and quiet, but had a rough night sleep because of it. We went to investigate and sure enough there were distinct bear prints around her tent and the spot where an obvious fresh digging had just happened. Around lunch my mom witnessed bear sighting number 3. She was walking with Baby Mary out of the bathroom and saw a smaller bear cross her path just 20 yards from her. She was not bothered by the little guy, but we made sure no children went anywhere alone. At dinner we were talking to my cousin Bryan who arrived in the middle of the night. He said he checked in with the front booth, parked in his families sight and was going to use the restrooms before sleeping in his car. He was about thirty feet from the bathroom and (no joke bear sighting number 4) a rather large bear came out of the bathroom. OUT OF THE BATHROOM!!!! I was just mortified for a second night. I am cool with camping, but not really camping with bears. Everyone made it with no intense bear encounters so I'll consider the trip good. We left Saturday around noon to head home.

We made a quick stop at Crater Lake in California. Not to be confused with the one in Oregon.

The final tourist stop was at Burney Falls where we enjoyed walking down the short path to cool off in the waterfall spray.

My Sisters Jenn and Dorthy

Jenn and Dorthy

Dorthy, Greg, and Nick

Jenn and Jacob

In the background: Jenn and Seth (tee hee)

I love you Jenn!

This is my beautiful sister Jenn posing for fun at the Japanese garden.

I miss you mommy and daddy!

Rosie and Seth hugging on the trampoline at Great Grandma Livingston's house. They were having so much fun.

We took a walk and Rosie picked a flower from someones garden. She was so excited to give it to me. Of course I had to explain how we can't just pick other people's flowers. She listened so well and she hasn't done it since.

This is Rosie being a 'statue' down on the pier in Olympia.

Seth, Rosie, and Mary enjoying the cold water flow in between their toes. We had so much fun and Rosie loves being in water. Rosie misses you so much Tammy and Corey.

My Graduation Surprise

Okay. So we got to Olympia with enough time do laundry then go off to Eastern Washington to attend Shane's Grandpa's memorial service. Grandpa Woods had passed away while we were in Hawaii and they waited for us to come home before having the service. That was a nice trip getting to know some of Shane's family, seeing Chris and Jessica Byers, and seeing Dorthy, Greg, and my new nephew Nick. It was really nice, but too short. We then spent the 4th of July at Shane's dads house with more fireworks than most shows these days. It was a blast to spend with our old long time friends the Byers and our new long time friends the Stmmels. The next day we drove to Shane's moms house. For those of you who don't know Shane's mom lives in Northern California just 30 minutes west of Redding. Kristel (Shane's mom) and Ernie own a beautiful Vineyard and Winery that they built from ground zero. They celebrated their 10 year anniversary of the vineyard on the 5th, so we rushed down to be apart of it for an hour. I was excited to find out what my graduation present was. In Hawaii Shane told me that a couple days after we go to Cali he would give it to me. I started to get worried the next morning when he said, "We have to talk." His grandmother put her arm around me and said, "It's okay. I'll be here for you." I was confused and even a bit scared for what Shane would say next. Then I saw it. I saw a luggage tag with a bright yellow Mickey Mouse head on it. I was immediately ecstatic. I thought Shane and I and baby Jay Jay were going to Disneyland. I couldn't even believe it when he told me it was Disney world with NO CHILDREN for eight days. Oh my goodness!

I cried and laughed and laughed till I cried while we were there. For those of you who also don't know. I used to work there. Crazy! I know! I worked the rides as an attractions hostess in the Magic Kingdom working the Buzz Lightyear ride, the Tomorrowland Transit Authority, and the Carousel of Progress. It was so amazing. I was devastated to find out that the Disney world trip the Stimmels were planning was just a cover for us going. I felt so bad that they were not able to get a trip alone like we are.

Shane planned a wonderful trip that even involved us going to Universal Studios and Universals Islands of Adventure. We had such a blast going on roller coasters, sleeping in, and enjoying each other. I loved seeing places that I hold dear and sharing them with Shane. Of course Shane didn't wait long before telling me that the Stimmels actually were coming. He said that I felt so bad and looked so sad that it wasn't worth keeping as an additional surprise.

It was so fun and we even were hit up with two Year of a Million Dreams prizes. The first was a personal safari tour where we had our own truck with two guides giving us a 'backstage' tour. They told us what things were real, fake, and interesting stories. The second was watching the fireworks from the best seats in the house. I have seen the fireworks from the top of the Astro Orbiter many times. I used to do it often when I worked nights to give guests a perfect Magical Moment. It was so fun to be able to share one of my fondest memories with my best friend Shane and Taylor and Leah. Shane, great job on a wonderful and unexpected graduation present. You really outdid yourself. It made me feel very special that you would take so much time, effort, and money to give me the most amazing graduation present ever.

This was our first vacation ever without children. We never went on a vacation before having kids, and we brought our boys on every vacation since they came into our lives. It was so nice to have so much time with all our attention on each other. You are my husband, the father of my children, and forever and always my best friend. I love you.

A Tag for the kids - Seth's

Seth looks like he's praying to Buddha at the Japanese Garden in Olympia.

1. What is something mom always says to you?
What kind of pictures did I like.

2. What makes mom happy?
taking pictures and looking for food in the kitchen

3. What makes mom sad?
angry face and fighting

4. How does your mom make you laugh?
to tickle me and be tricky

5. What was your mom like as a child?
happy

6. How old is your mom?
this many (holding his three fingers up)

7. How tall is your mom?
this tall (holding his hands about two feet apart)

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
play games

9. What does your mom do when you are not around?
walk away

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
play games

11. What is your mom really good at?
games and making food

12. What is your mom not so good at?
Mario Party like me.

13. What does your mom do for her job?
eat food

14. What is your mom’s favorite food?
a lot of ice cream

15. What makes you proud of your mom?
smiling

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Lucario or Jiggly Puff (Pokemon)

17. What do you and your mom do together?
eat

18. How are you and your mom the same?
nothing

19. How are you and your mom different?
I only have blond hair

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
She says I love you and I get to watch TV.